Thursday, September 22, 2011

Hakuna Matata, part 2.

{Part 1}

Fast forward a decade and a half later and I'm once again singing "Oh I just can't wait to be king..." with my 3 year old little girl. It was her favorite movie and since I was preggers with her little bro and slap outta energy and parenting prowess, she probably watched it a solid 4 times a day. All the way through.

Mom of the year right here.

The VHS started waning and other DVD's took it's place so Lion King got shelved for a few years.

Then I heard it was coming back out into the theaters for only a few weeks. I bought 6 tickets faster than you could say Hakuna Matata.

This family date proved to be far better than my first ill-attempt 17 years ago with a boy I robbed from the cradle. This time I didn't have a silly Simba singing me love songs during the credits.

No. No.

I had a real man. Whom you say?


{ooooooooh, do it again...}

And all the little hyenas we brought lived up to their name and cackled and screamed and whooped and hollered the whole time. 

Who would have ever known that I would see the same movie in the theater 17 years apart under very, very different circumstances.

Although I did throw a punch both times to the boys who tried to lay a smooch on me during the flick...maybe times haven't changed so much...

Wednesday, September 21, 2011

Hakuna Matata, part 1.

I looked out of the window of my house and saw a shirtless boy doing yard work in the neighbor's yard. I was 16. He was gorgeous. I needed a plan.

So as all girls do, I got on the phone and asked 75 of my closest girlfriends what I should do.

"There is this guy, and he is, like, so hot, and he is, like, basically in my yard, but not really, and I totally need to go out there, but I'm, like, totally nervous. Like, what should I do?"

Please hear 1994 in that phone call.

So as all girls do, they formed me up a plan. I was to clothe myself in my cutest outfit (which was probably some umbros and an XL tshirt), grab a broom and start sweeping the driveway. Surely conversation would naturally ensue.

I did as told and headed out to sweep the driveway of its 4 pieces of pinestraw. Mission failed. No convo.

I go back in, get my girls on 3-way and get a new plan. I head back out to get the mail, as told, and walk ever so slowly back up the driveway, then planting myself in the swing to open up all the mail that wasn't mine. Mission failed.

One more attempt as I decide to take out each bag of trash, separately of course, while inspecting the trash cans by the garage, when....

"Oh hey, I didn't see you there." Lies.

We have introductions. I find out he's the nephew of my neighbor coming over to help him out with yard work since he'd thrown out his back. Major points. His parents call to him as they are leaving so he has to go. Dang.

I let the girls know it was just SO CLOSE. SO VERY VERY CLOSE. But it wasn't meant to be. I'm sure I made a mixed tape about the situation.

Later that evening, I ran down to get something out of my car, when LO AND BEHOLD there's a note on the door.

"I'd love to take you out, call me..."

Um, yes please.

I didn't tell him it was to be my first real date. I didn't want to be the amateur dater. We made plans to see The Lion King on opening night followed by dessert at Chile's. I was giddy.

But there was a hitch.

"Um, I actually don't have a car so do you think you might could drive?"

Stunned. Losing joy of first date expectations quickly. "Can you borrow your parents' car maybe?"

"Well, I'm sorta not old enough to drive yet."

Slam on brakes. DO WHAT?!?!

I couldn't back out. He was a hottie. So what if he had just turned 15. He was taller than me and I was comfortable keeping that info to myself.

Date ensued. I drove up, met his parents at the door, felt like a man, and drove the two of us to the movies.

We sat in the theater with the credits rolling while he sang "Can you feel the love tonight". I know the other girls in there were jealous.

They wanted a Simba to their Nala like I had.

Monday, September 19, 2011

It's gonna be a LONG night...

...but the baby squirrels will finally have some comfort thanks in part to the donation from this paci millionaire.
The bowl was loaded and ready. We found 5 as we combed every crevice of this house. Praying we didn't miss one.
We made the climb into the fort. We sat a bit. We contemplated.
We sprinkled acorns around and then we waved goodbye.
Upon returning home from errands, the bowl had been knocked over and the "pappies" were M.I.A. Papa Squirrel had been waiting for us to leave so he could snatch them up and take them "way way up high" to his nest of 5 newborn babies.

And then came the night.

So far the screaming has only lasted 2 hours and the sheets have only been changed once due to vomitting.

If only I was a drinker...

Wednesday, September 14, 2011

Couch Concert.

One of the few ways we've learned how to calm this tyrant sweet buttercup down is to get him involved in a song. Diaper changes are accompanied by a song. Changing clothes is accompanied by a song. Putting on shoes is accompanied by a song. Placing food on the table in front of him is accompanied by a song.

Pretty much anything that can AND DOES cause a meltdown is accompanied by a song.

At some point he's going to figure us out and his little land of concert heaven is going to stop and the screaming and wailing and gnashing of teeth will yet prevail again.

Until then, enjoy this medley by the drooling buttercup. I am so glad he doesn't need any help with the words because they are spot-on.

Untitled from Suzanne Akins on Vimeo.