You cannot impart what you do not possess.
I recently talked with a friend of mine who is hurting. She has built up a wall around her heart (past pains, cynicism, lethargy) and very little is getting through. She wants it torn down...but then again she doesn't....because that would hurt. And life is easier when you're not hurting. But not knowing how to break through that, and not feeling like she can pray through the glass ceiling above her, is taking its toll. The fact that it's taking a toll says, to me at least, that one of those heart bricks has fallen off and God has placed His finger there.
I have, at times, felt the same way. I very much know the "glass ceiling" prayers. Thankfully, before months turned into years, I fought against my instincts to move further out and prayed through the glass...where God had been patiently waiting.
One thing that struck me in our conversation was how much we agreed that we want our kids to grow up loving Jesus, to love being a part of a church community, and to own their faith - not ours. HOWEVER, we cannot impart what we do not possess. Sure, we could luck out with awesome kids who go full throttle after Jesus with no help from us. But considering the first 18 or so years of their lives will be spent under the guidance and example of ME...uh, wow. Unless I am going full throttle after Jesus, I shouldn't expect my kids to. And in that, I can only pray that they do.
For now, I will pray for my friend. I will pray that her glass ceiling shatters and that she can know, again, the love of Jesus. Not to know for her kids' sake - they'll get the spillover. To know for herself.
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