Adjusted Preemie Time

That's my excuse for everything.

"Oh, the twins? Yeah, they're not on real people food yet, you know, with that adjusted preemie age and they might choke and what have you."
REALITY: It's a heck of a lot easier and quicker to grab 4 jars of baby food than to cook something separate. For now.

"Are the babies walking yet?"
REALITY: Giving them freedom to try out their walking skills doesn't happen often. Small house + 5 people in it during the day + the falls (doubled) = it's easier to keep them confined. Bouncy seats = Good. High chairs = Good. Uh, yeah, they're preemies so they've can't walk yet, right? he.he.he.

"Why do you still have your Christmas wreath on the front door?"
REALITY: If we claim adjusted preemie time, then it's kinda like being 3 months behind, so it's still Christmas at our house. In March.

I wonder at what point I'll have to stop owning this right to preemie-dom.

17 years from now: "Ma'am, the balance is due for your all 4 of your children's college education...today."
THE "DON'T THINK I WON'T TRY THIS" REALITY: "But, Mrs.Financial Aid, we're on adjusted preemie time so I don't actually owe you any money just yet. Let's talk about it when they adjust to their average ages. Say, in 15 years?"